Work friends are not real friends
Put down my papers in November. The farewell was super nice. Felt organic, promises to meet every weekend etc. talks.
For the last 2 years, these were the people I spent more time with than my actual family. Daily chai sutta break. Several parties on weekends.
The group has been silent ever since I left. The plans to catch up during new year/christmas also ignored because of something or the other.
It hurts to admit, but I realized we weren't friends. We were just trauma bonded. We were simply stuck in the same boat trying to survive the waves. Now that I’m on the shore, I don't exist for them - because the problems aren't shared.
Even when we meet - it will mostly be past gossip or updates on past gossip. Nothing beyond that.
Don't get too attached. Your colleagues are just characters in your current chapter. Once you turn the page, they don't follow you.
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Have seen mixed experiences myself My first job - the friends are in the same city now, and we meet almost once in 15 days without fail. This is 7 years later.
Some other jobs, yes it dropped off. It's who and what the vibe is when you all meet together.
I agree about the toxic workplace part. If it's toxic all the time, you barely talk about things outside work.
I used to arrange farewell parties for people in my previous company and no one even showed up in mine
That felt like a direct stab into the chest 🙃
😓😭😭
Atleast you got a farewell. I only got a farewell because another person in my department had the same LWD. Manager didn't joined my farewell lol but we move on
Some managers are really shitty. A person in my team worked for 12 years. After resignation, my manager would not even talk to him. Forget a good bye, he literally cut him out during the notice period. He just came to the office, watched Netflix and went home. 30 days straight..
You are talking about farewell??? Last time when I switched, I didn't get any message from my manager on the Farewell email. He didn't even try to call or even message during the notice period.
Itni expectations nahi hai manager se.
Also a reason why you shouldn’t marry someone from same workplace. It’s trauma bonding that’s the base for the relationship
Better to keep in mind they're only colleagues (silent competitors) not friends.
Kill your emotions & Accept dual faces.
Most of us know this on day one of our job, nothing new. 😃
What you are describing is the expected behaviour. Most office associations bond on shared trauma and co-rumination. You were on a boat with people who were on the same journey. Now your off the boat. Your journey with them has ended. It's really hard in today's day and age to even find someone who is interested in long term associations leave alone friendship. That's why lonely ness is the new epidemic.
Very nice metaphor of boat