Sam's .. 32M guy
I am married last month my wife complaining she doesn't want to stay in my home and asking to move to Bangalore. I am having WFH she recently helping out in kitchen that too mom and sisters keep on calling her to help. (Their intention is they're here for somedays and they can teach her something. Also, if we didn't ask her to do house work then she will get used to it and won't work in future
Her parents said she knows cooking. She still says she knows but she didn't cook properly so they talked about it (she heard it) Now she is complaining my family members are talking bad about her. She is new to the house so food won't be good why to talk about it? My whole family wakeup before sunrise (before 6 am) yet she sleeps till we wake her up. If I wake her at 7 she will open eyes and sleep another half an hour. Later she help my mom Again after lunch we normally sleep for half an hour to 1 hour ( between 1 pm - 3 pm) She sleeps at 2 pm till 5.30 pm We normally have food between 1 - 1.30 pm she is not okay with it. ( She will have after 2 pm ) She says if she cooks then food doesn't taste. Also her hometown food taste better than our home food so she is unable to eat.
I am trying to avoid clash and adjusting with her any suggestions on how to handle the situation..?
I'll post other story here later...
Yes I am that 32M guy if you remember
Talking product sense with Ridhi
9 min AI interview5 questions
From ur post is sounds like ur mom n sister r trying to just boss around that too in 1st month of marriage. It's important to understand for all 3 parties that now she is part of family. U guys should have given some flexibility at the start n should have started introducing things slowly. She feels that u all are one sided n m sure she is sleeping so much intentionally just to avoid work n family members. First 3 months r usually honeymoon period.
If ur marriage is already in bad state just for cooking n cleaning then it's really sad.
Ppl in love automatically cook for earchother.
Every coin has 2 sides bro, you told your side. Now coming to your wife, see she left all her world behind that is her family to come and spend her entire life in a stranger house, yes initially she might feel that.
So I'd suggest you and your wife live separately from your family. By taking this step, you both will get to know each other very well, also you both can do household chores together, this will strengthen your relationship more .
Sure bro.. I need some time to move out. As we recently got married. So do you suggest to leave her in her house till I moved to Bangalore?
I just have one thing to ask..What does she thinks her part is in the marriage?? If she doesn't work.. What does she intends to do in a marriage.. if she cant cook or clean.. wake up at 7-8 than again sleep for 2-3 hours in afternoon.?? Is her only job is to milk the money you earn? .. She wants to move to banglore where it is normal for people to have maid for everything despite seeing the fact that all those women who have maid are already hardworking women.. whereas yours just want to live a "aish wali life" while you work like a donkey.. I too have seen a 'Bhabhi' recently been married..who is just like her... She comes from a family of many girls.. Once due to slip of tongue she admitted that it is nowadays taught to girls to answer things like this.. I dont know how to cook I was always busy studying and career while not achieving anything..She doesnt even know how to wear a saree..Dont even want to learn anything that could save some bucks..Its taught to them that if you learn it and do it once also you will have to do it for the rest of your life.So they intentionally do it badly if they have to do it so that noone ask them to do it again.. Can you justify this line.. the food tastes better in her hometown than where you live now??? how so.?? Do they use vegetables from Mars??? .. Some Girls nowadays are a Real Piece of Shit.(But even now some girls are good) .. And If you will ask some logical questions like this na..As I asked above or why you want to move to banglore , or anything... be ready for a good fight.. because she will do it 100% ... Feeling sorry for you brother..
Your family wakes up at 6 so she can't sleep till 7:30?? And she should have food as per your timings?? If she sleeps for 3 hrs in the daytime, what's the issue..anyway there wouldn't be any work in those hours I assume.
I hope this is just a sarcastic post, else it appears you and your whole family is making it suffocating for her..give her some time to adjust atleast
7.30? No it goes 9.30 - 10 am if unattended. We all having food at certain timings, whole family sits together and have food. So we expect her to be one of us not alone. Afternoon nap is fine but village side some or other work will be there to do. It is new environment and new place for her so it takes time to adjust we too expecting her to slowly get customed
Wow… You just picked points that suitable for you. You did not question what she does in remaining time. How she’s contributing to the household. How’s she trying to gel with family. Just play victim card every effing time.
Bro I can feel the pain and frustration but all this needed has to be discussed and aligned before marriage.
अब पछताए होत क्या जब चिड़िया चुग गई खेत
Bro my cousin brother is also in the same situation, getting shit scared of this marriage scene... Nobody is ready to adjust these days..
True bro.. She says I will adjust before marriage. now she says she doesn't likes my parents, my sisters, my home, my home food etc etc
Bro it's very common nowadays. I am also trying my best to adjust my wife in my family but she is not willing to do so. I already moved out but still there are issues between them
Bruddah, the list to not getting married is getting bigger and bigger.
I don't wanted to post but many were asking how it is going so posted...
Move to blore for at least 6 months or 1 year (till the time first you two will adjust )
Then slowly things will change hopefully!!
PS: BTW I'm not married and also don't have experience as you have
I too feel same but atleast in home I have parents my side. In Bangalore she will bring her parents then it will be hard to breathe
You should have hired a maid instead of marrying that lady & ruining her life!
Brother I rejected her before marriage. It's her choice to marry me
It's normal for everyone to have expectations. Just like how you have.
I too expecting my dream wife to be like this and I too have my way to keep my queen happy.
I am not asking to change completely. It takes time so adjust for a while and evrything will be alright