Question for forty year plus software engineers.

There is no intimacy you can expect after 40 due to various reasons. Your saman issue is differnt, practice kegal exercises if you have time.

Find some stress free time, relaxed environment. The brain readies your body for sex, not the samaan.

If you're stressed out all the time and constantly hustling, bhool ja samaan ka apne.

Also, ensure your partner is also not stressed out.