It's exhausting , painful, pitiful, self blaming , no escapism, raw truths, broken trust etc.Out of 9 yr married life , just 2 months before I came to know my husband living with another married woman with 2 kids by marrying her and got baby last week while I was killing and invested myself on 2nd IVF n parents home based on his allegations he needs baby of his own blood ?I am such an fool , I blamed myself all this time and was rotting in guilt trip of not able to conceive , and taken all signs of no show , ignorance, fight, unavailability of my husband even for my surgeries etc ,though I fight he will turn it twds me itself.. jus 2 months I came to know this shit now my IVF stopped with egg retrieval, I am not allowed in my marital home , learnt that he pledged my 50 sovereign jewels for debt, I have 7 credit cards Operating on my name and I have 7 lakh debt on that , wow....now when I confront he says " PPL questioned my manliness , so I am in a situation to do this , but I don't hate u, still go ahead with treatment, I will pay money and once u conceive u can have baby aa holding for ur life and I ll exercise my responsibility as dad , else come and live in my home along with my mom and perimma, I will give u OTT access, join u n JIo family plan , will continue using ur ccs and do money rotation and will give u the benefits of that like myntra , amazon vouchers , u earn, improve urself , u can very well get hike if u jump to another company, and if u still need money on top of ur salary incan give u , and I ll visit u monthly once , I don't want divorce, I can live with both of u , else if u still need divorce , get ur alimony and jewels 35 sovereign that your dad gave at time of marriage , sign for transferring the joint property owned by both of us to my name and get ur divorce,else if u go to court or police station ,it's just waste of time because adultery is not crime , so I cannot be punished , and I have political and local influence , I can very well destroy you" and that girl said " what's ur problem , can't you just shut and live , we both like each other and we are living , did we disturbed you ? Y can't u lay low ? And my inlaw family accepted their relationship and telling " how long we will put up with ur infertility journey we can't leave that girl bcs she gifted us invaluable baby so u have no rights to talk about this either adjust and live else we have our ways "$.. Right now I am staying in hostel contining my job , earn only 40k , I compromised my career a lot bcs we are family of 3 and husb earns 3 lakh per month so I thought my only focus should be baby and now here am , running behind laws and police and he just living happily with that woman and their 3 children ( he even settled with that woman husband bcs he came to know she is married only after she conceived ) and now he says she is her lifeline and I am ugly and have no status ..
All I did was believing this person , loving him , caring him , harming myself for his happiness and now am paying for this stupidity, U know this world even accepted this illegal relationship and says this is normal and now I am questionable for my foolishness of believing my husband , having salary to him for all 9yrs which he now called as " picha kasu" , gave all jewels to MIL and everyday going through trauma of cheating and stress of legal implications..
I just want to runaway , get myself a home , ggo to diff place , earn and live but all I have is 3 month salary , and lesson of failure for believing own husband
