Controversial Subject here ...
In India today, many people focus on money or looks when choosing a partner. But is that why some couples still feel unhappy, even when everything seems perfect?
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Because money and looks aren't everything. Behaviour and their own character is important. The bubble of social media of how marriage should be gets burst when someone's married life starts and things don't go as per an individual or couple's expectations. It takes a hell lot of effort, patience, understanding and putting ego aside to make it work.
The best example - our parents who survived the test of time again and again no matter what the circumstances.
I feel people have set up wrong filters when going into long term relationships. The primary thing they look for is money and looks. While it's good to have these filters, you're going to stay with this specific person for some 20+ years, if you're getting married that is.
Do people really want to make their judgement by the bank they make ? Does that make them compatible as partners for the long term game ?
Or do they want to make it based on some physical attributes which are bound to wear off as you grow old ?
Things like compatibility, shared goals, outlook towards life have taken a backseat while selecting a partner. And in the long run it'll make one unhappy and start rethinking.
Yes. Beauty is skin deep and money is transient. While money and looks can provide initial advantages or societal approval, they are rarely sufficient for deep, lasting happiness in a relationship. True fulfillment stems from emotional connection, shared values, mutual respect, effective communication, and the ability of partners to support each other's growth and well-being. When these core elements are missing, unhappiness can persist even in seemingly "perfect" circumstances.
In the Indian context especially, where family pressures / interference still dominate, there can be immense pressure (already deeply ingrained in our psyche) to marry someone who meets certain external criteria (e.g., good job, fair skin, family status). Couples might fulfill these societal expectations but sacrifice their own personal happiness and compatibility in the process.
ya bcos life is a bitch
Because most people conflate what love is with the media's portrayal of what love is. Combine it with modern day hedonism and of course people would be unhappy.
everyone is going to disappoint you, so you might as well get disappointed by someone you enjoy looking at
Marriage has been a validation scheme. Earlier when it was for the validation of the family, it was successful. Now it has come to the validation of the individuals, people are unhappy.