Being Frugal vs Being Miser
Personally, I don't have irresponsible spending habits. But I feel that because of that I spend too little even if I can spend more.
You can say I am a MISER. I want to change it for myself. I want to make myself a sensible spender, without having the guilt of over-spending.
I mean, you understand that sweet spot. I want to hit that, but face a lot of difficulties.
People who know me say, I am frugal and not a miser. And those who don't know or don't understand the thought behind this spending habit tell me I am a miser.
Fellow Grapeviners. Can you help me with this out?
P.S - My opinion is that since I was a single child of lower middle class parents who could not even afford school fees (took admission under EWS quota) to become a family who is financially strong. I feel extreme guilt, when I think of spending money and analysing the value vs money graph.
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Friend, whatever makes you feel empowered and relaxed is good. Frugal, miser, doesn't enjoy life etc are all terms made by the world to fit others in their agenda. If having cash in Bank gives you a feeling of empowerment instead of trips, SIPs, daaru party etc, do it. You owe it to yourself, your L1 blood relatives, and your partner, and nobody else.
Spend some time to list down your needs and wants which require spending money. Decide on a percent of your income which you want to spend on wants (since needs cannot be optimized). Now collect the want % of your income in a separate account / FD until it is enough to fulfill one of your wants. This will also give you a sense of achievement since you are delaying gratification, should overpower or atleast shadow the feeling of guilt.
Noted. Sounds good. I already do that btw. But still thanks.
Be comfortable in your own skin. It's your life, your rules.
A lot of spend is just upkeep of appearances, and if you don't care about that, it's good for you.
Having said that, given you the fortune of having a much better income than before as a family, you shouldn't shy away from indulgences. A better located house, amenities, some creature comforts and the occasional splurge.
Us bhai Us! 🫠 Being from the lower middle class, I feel guilty for spending 400 bucks on coffee! Still my mind is not conditioned to spend a lot on myself.
Relatable AF