8 years of software engineering finally ending

Hi guys

TLDR : Lived Life the best i could, Lost parents to covid which has been very tough for me. Tried my best to find a partner to live life ahead since i have everything else. Its better to leave. Being ugly is a sin, and no one should go though this

I am a Senior Software Engineer at Uber. I graduated at 21 years of age from a tier 2 college with a humbling package. I did worked hard, got there where i always wanted to be and forgave myself for the failures at entraces of colleges. I only studied in college. Yup, you got that right, zero dressing sense, never went to gym and never cared about my health. Zero college life with friends and zero female interaction.

In corporate I imporved on these things, gym, personality, self care and finally reliving my hobbies, while also working on getting a better job and sharpening my skills, travalled and clicked some great memories.

But it was never enough, my parents always wished to get me married, have a family of own, they wanted to see me settled, but that didnt worked.

I am a turbaned guy although i trim my beard, 5 11 without shoes, brown skin from a middle class family. I am ugly.

I was always rejected till my college. I hope once i worked on myself, things will be different, But NO, I did ended up making some good female friends along the line of corporate. Dating results were still zero.

Parents did their best, but all the matches they got were only interested in my money and assests. None of them bothered to ask about how i was as a person, how my day went, what i like to eat and what little things my heart desires. All my friends are married with children, and meetups are not possible since everyone is settled now.

My little brother, an army officer, very good looking, got married to his girlfriend, a sweet and caring soul. These two gave me one of the best gifts of my life, my niece, soooo cuteeee, i just love her so much, she gets excited whenever she sees me. Bringing her gifts, her barbie dolls, her clothes makes me happy to the core.

Covid took away my parents, no amount of my money could save them. I did tried to live for them, but its getting diffcult.

I did tried matrimonial webistes, but in span of 4 years, i only got 3 matches, and only one agreed to meet me, things were going quite smooth, but one day she texted she was being forced to marry me and she loves someone else. I respect her for her honesty.

I am tired tbh, tried my best to live life, travelled, made awesome friends, contributed to NGOs, taught children and did sewa wherever it was possible. Helped some of kids prepare for JEE and crack good colleges, one even made it to IIT Roorkee, all of them are working now at very good packages and helping other kids to crack entrance exams. Drew sketches of people travelling in trains and flights, the warm smile they gave me back used to made my day.

I went for around a year in the US due to onsite requirement, even there the situation wasnt that much different.

I have resigned and its time to go. I am going back to my parents.

For all my investments, my brother is my nominee, I have enough savings so that angel niece never face any problems in her entire life. I posted here, since I spent a decent of my life here studying and practicing. Thought i should tell this to my homies haha.

Goodbye everyone, All the Best.

You are strong Signed